The Crew - Miss Fabulous, Lil Bro, Big Sis and Mr. Man

Monday, November 2, 2009

Weekend Report

We did some more hanging out outside this past weekend.  The weather is much more tolerable here now for outside activity and we are really enjoying it.  Miss M has done GREAT!  WE MADE IT THROUGH THE MONTH OF OCTOBER WITH NO RAGE!!! 

She has a cold right now and it is getting to that point of she is either going to get better or worse, today should tell.  A few times she entered into a funk momentarily but we were able to help her turn it around and she did.  She even went to her room and played on her own some - SHOCKING!  She NEVER plays on her own she is always in hyper alert mode and seeking attention.  She went in her room and played with Littlest Pet Shop toys and watched a movie.

She and Big Sis are doing famously.  The looks of love that Miss M has for that Big Sis make my heart melt.

Big Sis has been a hormonal mess, I don't know.  We will see what unfolds there.

Mr. C has had a few struggles.  I call it the Gotcha Day Blues.  This past week he has been full of emotions and minor melt downs and has needed a lot of reminders that I will love him forever and that he is always going to be mine.  He did the same thing to Dad.  He got into a big huff and was yelling that Dad is mean and that Dad doesn't like him, etc.  It works well to direct him with very few words.  I asked him to sit at the table and tell me about it.  He sat down and started tugging at a bag of apples aggressively.  Since he likes to smash and break things when he is upset I let him have at the bag for a minute and then he said, "Can you open this bag?!"  So I took out an apple, washed it and began cutting it up.  He sat munching and talking about how Dad doesn't help him do what he wants to do and Dad doesn't like him.  I said, "Oh so when Dad is fixing your games he doesn't like you?  Or when he takes you to the store just you and him he doesn't like you?  I guess when you and him play chess on the computer together he definitely doesn't like you then?  I that right?" 

He said, "Well ..."  and continued munching apples.  I went back to cooking and it seemed he had resolved things in his mind.  He went out to the garage where Dad was working and came back in with a sticker that Dad had made saying, "Mr. C # 1."  Apparently he received the needed reassurance and moved on.

Later at bath time he said, "Be careful not to mess up my sticker from Dad."

For Miss M and Mr. C both this adoption anniversary time of year brings up a lot of "stuff".  I have read about and agree that the brain remembers.  No one has to tell them it is gotcha time, their behavior says it all.

Additionally, the Halloween decorations everywhere scare Mr. C and he has nightmares about all the spiders and spider webs.  I fell like this next week will be better.  Even still, the med has helped him greatly because his temper never escalated out of control.  He was directed to his room and went and then I was able to go in and help him calm down.

Here are the pics from this weekend.


Jeri said...

I can see by Big Sis's photo that she is in the changing stage of life. Oh boy, what a rough time to be betwixt and between. Part of you wants to be a little girl forever (I wish I could go back!) and the other part wants to have the privileges of the elders. One thing I taught Hannah to do when in hormonal or anytime stress was to do stress breathing. Breathe in deeply through the nose and slowly count while exhaling through the mouth. Our neurotypical kids don't just have the normal hormonal hades to go through but have the added stress of experiencing raging siblings and the anger/guilt that comes with all that extra attention and how mom and dad are impacted.

So glad to see that Miss M is moving more and more towards self-regulation. Yes! Someday, my son will get there too. Our kids brains and bodies remember even if they're not conscious of it. Alex too had great difficulties around gotcha time plus same for Mr.C, it's in the midst of the holiday season getting going (his is Nov.30th)which is also a major trigger.
Praying for continued positives for the family in the land of the loo-loos.

Mom 4 Kids said...

Thanks Jeri! I sent you an e-mail.