The Crew - Miss Fabulous, Lil Bro, Big Sis and Mr. Man

Monday, July 12, 2010

The Results Are In

The nominees in the category of 'who knows that kid best' are:

Mrs. Teacher

Critical family members

But in Friend

and

The Mom

And the award goes to...

















THE MOM!

Miss Fabulous has NO LEARNING disabilities, average to low average intelligence, wants things to be easy and instantly gratifying, her way, and she wants the easy route to getting there - excessively so.  VERY low frustration tolerance, boredom tolerance and her way of handling this is to explode and tantrum or disassociate.

The clinician said that it would be easy to miss the fact that she has disconnected mentally in the classroom setting because she is "still looking right at you" but "she isn't there anymore". 

At home and with family she is confident and comfortable to let it all hang out and so she explodes and tantrums.  She knows the right behavior choice, chooses not to make that choice because she wants what she perceives as the easy way to what she wants.

She has isolated herself emotionally.  Clinician said, "She has a wall up with borders and a mote.  She is not interested in anyone getting in."  She views other children as either a threat or competition that is in the way of getting what she wants.  Therefore we see lacking peer relationships and bullying.  At present she is not interested in being their friend she wants them to get out of her way. 

I swear the clinician said all this.

We will get the written report shortly but she showed us all the info.  Because this is through the university the supervisor has to sign off on the report before the clinician can give it to us and the clinician has to meet with the parents before she can present the report to the supervisor to be signed.

In terms of academics it is exactly as I/We suspected, she is capable of better results but the better results require effort on her part and she is not putting forth effort.  This is the reason for the inconsistency.  She needs to be motivated and made to push through to the results not babied with excuses made for her.  I AM TALKING TO YOU MRS. TEACHER!

Processing and sequencing are not strong points for her but she does not have a disorder and still falls with in the normal limits in those areas, again she just needs to be willing to make more effort to use the skills that "she clearly has".

As soon as I get the results in writing I am going to meet with the principal at the school and explain how last year went, how this year needs to go and ask her to make her decision on this years teacher based on this information.  This kid needs a butt kicker not a babier.

The clinician said there was a huge lack of effort on Miss Fabulous part during the testing.  Whether it was math or reading she always wanted to skip on to the answer and not do any work.  The answers were random and didn't seem to have base in knowledge most of the time.  Even when she was guessing at words instead of decoding there did not seem to be any reason to what word she was guessing.  We see this all the time.  When she was interested in the topic then she she could sustain attention and put forth better effort.

She did not test with in the range of a child with ADHD.  The lack of attention is from lack of effort.

Team sports was recommended because the emphasis is put on functioning as a group and no one person functions independent of the team.  Soccer is at the top of the list.

Sadly most things that she recommended are things we are and have been doing.  She seemed to understand that because she emphasised that Miss Fabulous knows what to do she is choosing not to do it.  I guess the old 'you can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink' applies here.

I will add more later as I remember it, there was so much!

4 comments:

Tara - SanitySrchr said...

Hmmm...sounds like she needs the teacher Bam Bam had last year. Phenominal!!! I'm certainly praying that next year's teacher is exactly what she needs.

You're doing a great job!

The Accidental Mommy said...

Bah! The Guata-Ukraine twins strike again! Seriously, I got the same results from Genea's speech and language testing! We did not go into friends and social skills etc but the results of all the tests showed no disorders. Her speech pattern is habit and her word finding problem is behavioral as she uses it to drag out the attention she is getting at the time. BAH!!!!

Jeri said...

Hmmmmm, you spend YEARS with them 24/7, guess that would make you more attuned to their needs. Glad you got the results and that now, things can move forward with a more behavioral attuned IEP. You go, Mama!

stellarparenting.com said...

glad to know that somone admits parents are right! Hope that the school listens now!