Too True Tuesday from The Accidental Mommy, this is funny stuff.
Similar to the Accidental Mommy’s post about Some Poor Woman at the airport I too have observed yet Some Other Poor Woman (we’ll call her SOPW) at the Wal-Mart restroom in an obvious parallel life with SPW – airport version.
SOPW seemed to have a 6 year old son with I am guessing Asperger’s Disorder who had apparently had to go and have his glasses replaced at the Wal-Mart eyeglass store for oh I am guessing probably the 10th time in the last six months. Of course said son of SOPW had to go pee and so off they trotted to the restrooms. They entered the large restroom at the end. By this time it appeared SOPW’s Mother In Law had joined them with a bunch of other kids, I lost count. They all piled into that potty at the end of the row of potties and when it was MIL’s turn Mr. Asperger’s loudly pointed out that “Hey Nan you have hair down there!” The entire restroom, which was packed to capacity, went silent. Accept, for the child that went on to ask further questions like Why? How? When? And no the restroom patrons did not wait to let their laughter floweth forth until after SOPW and family exited restroom. Boy did I feel bad for SOPW.
One time Mr. C went with Nan to a person’s home that he did not know. Said person had apparently burned some food item shortly before Mr. C arrived. Mr. C enters the home and begins to announce, “What is that smell? Boy your house sure does smell bad? Nan why does this place smell so so bad?” A red-faced Nan hissed “shh, it smells like a little burnt toast we will talk about this later.” “Burnt toast! Why did you burn the toast? Did you know it was going to smell like this? Boy this burnt toast really stinks, geeze Louise does it ever stink!”
On yet another occasion I was yet again faced with SOPW and a toddler son this time. Probably 2 and a half, I’m guessing. Probably recently potty trained, I’m guessing. Again picture the Wal-Mart restrooms. Picture SOPW sitting to use the toilet with toddler son present and as it happens in nature a minor toot-toot tooted forth. To which toddler son pointed out in the loudest voice I’ve ever heard, “Mom you toot-toot your butt!” Again, restroom was PACKED FULL OF PEOPLE because after all it is Wal-Mart.
On yet a separate other occasion I once again encountered SOPW with a toddler son and yet again they headed off to the restroom at a truck stop full of, you guessed it Truckers. Said toddler announces that he has to, “Poop out my butt Mom! We got hurry! I got poop out my butt!” Why this toddler child needed to be so loud I’ll never know. I sure did empathize with SOPW as she hissed “shh” and quickly shuffled off to the restroom.
What I have deduced from my observations, mainly of SOPW, is that the more children one has the more opportunity there is to be completely and utterly embarrassed in a public setting. That and it may be wise to avoid Wal-Mart bathrooms at all cost.