may break my bones but words will never hurt me. I remember saying that as a kid. I wonder who came up with the phrase. Not enough to google it but still I wonder. It isn't true. Words can tear right through our heart. Words like, "I want my real mom!"
Yes the Fabulous Miss M hit below the belt today. She was on her way to her room for being inappropriate and I'll just leave it at that. She was angry.
She just woke up struggling today and I am not sure the reason why. Apparently thoughts of the past had come a knockin and her heart was hurting so she decided to hurt mine. It worked but my therapeutic Mom brain kicked in and we used it.
I went in and asked her why she wanted her real Mom? What is a real Mom?
She said a real Mom is the person that takes care of you "I guess". I asked her who took care of her and she said that I do.
We talked about a lot of things and something that she did seem to follow was the fact that we are her real parents because we have papers from a judge that say so. I brought out all of the kids birth certificates from the state. They all pretty much look the same and the wording is such that she can read it herself. Each child's name and then our names as the parents. I showed her that we have a special safe that we keep these papers in because they are important to us. She seemed to take it all in.
The fact is she is hurting today. Her hugs were stiff and fake, she had Chinese water torture on her radar today, she did a million and two things to push me away and yet try to remain in control of me and my attention.
We will get the train back on the tracks and keep on keeping on. A few days ago she was doing amazingly well and she has made a great amount of progress lately but it does tend to be 3 steps forward and 2 steps back and today we took a few steps back. Hopefully tomorrow we will once again be moving forward.
It was amazing to see Mr.'s reaction to what Miss M said to me. He had that shock face :-0 and said, "She must be trying to tell a joke or something. You are the real Mom!" He can give me a hard time in his own way but that kid has a sweet heart.