Miss M went to the doctor today for her lingering head cold. It is not the Flu, no fever at all. Doc put her on antibiotics and the good stuff cough medicine. She is resting in my bed watching a video. I gave everyone assigned things to do. Mr. C was on Wii and Computer in the Living Room, Big Sis and Lil Bro were watching a Sponge Bog DVD in the boys room, and I was bed side with Miss M keeping her regulated.
She has done okay. She has been pretty passive aggressive toward me, but that's better than full out aggressive. And then ... everyone decided to pile into my room and watch Toy Story 2 with Miss M. I felt that rush of cold hot panic sick to my stomach feeling. You know where all the noise goes quiet and you hear your own heart beat? Yeah, I have my own PTSD.
Dad and I had tried to coordinate 2 adults. It just wasn't happening. Nan has state survey in the nursing home this week and so can not leave the building until the surveyors are gone. Dad had a day, everything pending, everything urgent, the big money accounts, etc. It was one o'clock when we left the pediatricians office and school gets out at 2:20. She isn't way sick, she is yucky nose sick. Dad said the option he could offer was to take her along with him and try to finish up as quickly as possible. I just didn't feel good about that. I felt like a crumb to take her back to school for an hour so that she could go to aftercare basically.
I said a prayer and asked for direction. She has been doing so much better. She has been more than a month with no rage fits. Her meds are right on track. She is improving all the time. So I decided to go for it. I have learned to be a manipulator for the positive. It hasn't been easy for me because like I have said before the direct approach comes more naturally to me. I don't agree with manipulating other people, say it like it is or don't say anything. But ... that just doesn't work so well with Miss M and what does work is helping her to feel as if she has control even if what she really has control of is the choices I have laid out for her. So I asked her, "Do you want to go with Dad to his work or do you want to go back to school? It's up to you." She was caught off guard at first and said "Dad". Then she said, "No, I will go back to school." I said, "Do you feel up to it?" She said she did so I said, "Okay."
It seems to work best for her to understand in this round about way that there are other options, she doesn't have to be stuck with me. Then as we neared the school, which is near to our house also, I asked if she wanted to go home and go to bed. Did she feel sick enough to go home and go to bed to rest? She said that she did.